Chapter Thirty

26 weeks

On Sunday Richie brought Ava home again, even if it was summer Ava was still coming over every other week. It was easier than changing the whole rhythm.

While he was gone, Sarah took her chance to talk to her sons about the lawsuit. She hadn't mentioned anything yet to them but it was getting close to the next meeting and she decided to ask them for their opinions. Believing they were old enough to make their own decision in wanting to testify or not. The decision was entirely their own even if she didn't feel completely comfortable with that, she felt like she should let them call the shots.

So after Richie and Ava had left, Sarah asked both her sons to meet her in the living room. Once they walked in, she immediately noticed their worried faces. She couldn't let them worry and started explaining what happened.

She started with how it all had started, the phonecall Richie had received and the reason why they had gone to Montana.

It was difficult to tell them the whole truth, what Jonathan had done and what the accusations were. The boys their faces weren't full of worry anymore but shocked.

Watching her sons confused by it all, Sarah felt like she had to explain more about, she hadn't ever really talked to them about who their father was. With that she also decided to start with the beginning, how she had met Jonathan in college, right before wanting to start med school. How she had to give up med school because she was too busy drinking and had to support herself and Jonathan.

The only thing she was proud about telling was, was how she had gone to rehab all by herself even though Jonathan was very much against it and had tried to stop her. She was proud she had done it despite that might having been the reason to make her marriage so bad.

But she didn't explain everything too detailed, she didn't want to make it sound too bad, she told them about the beating, but left out her injuries. She didn't feel comfortable telling them about the rape she had gone through so many times but told them anyway.  If she wanted to tell them about their father, she had to tell them everything and so she did.

"What if I'm like him?" Caleb blurred out, both surprised for thinking it but even more for saying it out loud.

Sarah looked at him, a bit shocked he would think that, her eyes went over to Noah to see if he thought the same way, then back to Caleb.

"You're nothing like him. Neither of you are." Sarah said, trying to reassure them. "You've both never been in fight, never been in real trouble and I'm sure you've never thought about hitting your girlfriend or have had sex when she didn't want to."
They both felt uncomfortable now that their possible sex lives had become a subject but both agreed that they had never done that.
"But what if we do when we're drunk? Like Jonathan was?"
Sarah sighed. "Well, if you worry about that, I can only tell you not to drink. I know everyone is always so excited about drinking but you can have just as much fun while being sober. You don't need to be drunk for that. Besides that, you know alcohol isn't allowed at home."
Both boys nodded.

"Do we have to testify in court?" Noah asked after a few minutes of silence.
"No, you don't have to but it would increase Jonathan's chances for going to jail and for a longer time."
"So it's best if we do." Caleb concluded.
"He'll be there when we go?" Noah asked his next question a little unsure about wanting to know the answer.
Sarah sighed again, she understood, she didn't want to see Jonathan either. "He'll be in the same court room so you will have to see him but I don't think we'll be allowed to talk."
Again, both boys nodded their understanding.

"It's up to you if you want to or not. Don't feel forced at any moment, it's entirely up to you, no one else, not even me." Sarah told them, trying to be very clear about it. "But I do have to know in a few days, so think about what you want to do and let me know."

Again both boys nodded their understanding and agreement. Sarah really hoped they understood there was no pressure whatsoever on them. If they wanted to go, then that would be fine, if they didn't, it would be just as fine.

"And I'm always here if you need to talk about something." She added quickly, just in case they still needed a judgement on their decision or wanted some helping in making up their minds.

After the boys had left the room again, Sarah thought her conversation had gone pretty well. She had been completely honest with them and hoped they could both make their own decision on the matter.

She still didn't know how much her sons had witnessed but she didn't want to put more pressure on them and start asking about that. Maybe when they had made their decisions, then she could ask them to talk to her about it to find out how much they had known about their father.

Eventhough she felt it had gone well, she was still glad to see Richie when he got him. It still felt as a relief to see her husband whenever she did something that was difficult for her.

Together with Richie, Sarah walked back to the living room and watched some TV with him. She loved the easy times with him, just being cuddled up on the couch with him.

Not much later, that was how Sarah fell asleep, her head on Richie's shoulder, her arms wrapped around his waist, as were his arms wrapped around her.